If you look at media & advertising influences, I wouldn’t be surprised if you said no.
Sometimes it feels as though we are constantly being sold something to add value to our lives. Clothing, homewares, gadgets, diet supplements, holidays. All these things which we somewhat get the vibe will complete us once we obtain them. Our insecurities get fed and we want to fill the void with whatever we're being sold.
I still struggle with feeling as though I’m a work in progress, which I totally am. The only issue I find is that I occasionally feel like I’m working towards perfection. Do you relate? Like you’re constantly trying to achieve your Pinterest life. And as much as I love inner growth and self improvement, it’s been a huge leap for me to realise that I am everything I need to be. Right now and forever.
So I wanted to take some time to introduce you to tips that I believe have really helped me to come to peace with my wholeness.
Stop requiring validation from outsiders.
Typical scenario. You get all dressed up to go out and you’re partner doesn’t even notice the hair, make up, brand new dress and heels that are a touch to small but make your legs look 4 feet long. It’s DEVASTATING. But why is it so upsetting? Because we’re trained to seek approval in others. Secret is - you don’t need it. In this situation, you know you look great and you feel great, that’s all that matters. Let’s stop waiting for someone else to tell us we’re good enough, pretty enough, smart enough and validate ourselves. If it feels good inside, do a little happy dance and acknowledge your own achievements. Then when someone else takes notice, it’s great, but it’s just something you already knew.
Notice who you’re trying to be, and who for.
When I was growing up I really wanted to be Dawn from the Babysitters Club. Like, so badly. I wanted her hair, her hippie outfits and her cool laid back parents. Then as I got older, I stopped wanting to be Dawn. Because instead of wanting to be someone, I wanted to be the perfect version of someones someone. I wanted to be that cute girl, the one that all the boys liked. I was eager for the approval of my crushes, and the envy of my friends. This didn’t get me very far. I was so mixed up in who I was (kind of clumsy and a barefoot beach lover) and who I thought I should be. My hair was blonde, brown, purple, black and then pink. I was constantly fighting with what I thought people wanted me to be and what I really was. If I could just grab my teen self by the shoulders and let her know that being completely uniquely yourself will attract the people you should be around, I would. So now I’m my own version of me. If I change it’s because that is my natural flow in life, not because I want to become more like someone else or someone I think people would like me to be.
Focus on expanding your inner light, not adding to your physical self.
We all like stuff. But even more than a new dress, perfect home or great hunk of a husband, nothing will fulfil you more than connecting with your hearts real desires. I’m not talking things that money can buy, I’m talking about those little moments that make you take a deep breath and feel blissfully whole. Grass between your toes, a long warm cuddle with someone you love, the sound of waves and the smell of the ocean on a summers day. These are things that will expand your inner light. Adding more of this goodness into your life with fulfil you more than anything else every could.
You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.
- Maya Angelou
I hope this has somehow made you more aware of the miracle that you are. Everything you need is right inside, make the most of it. Next step, comment below and let me know what you'll be doing to add to your own inner light.